16
Aug
2011
42 – that was the answer to life, the universe & everything….
remember DOUGLAS ADAMS ???
he made a tremendous joke – of the humans who want to fix the world – all the unhappiness caused by the imperfectness of the universe – instead of just enjoying life as we go along – … well just read it again, it’s fun!
I just sorted out all my brain & I’m rebooting – going through piles of paper: sketches, snippets, notes of thoughts & ideas (chucking out as many as possible)
with the aim to leave context & text & conclusion & illustration behind – drawing – drawing – drawing
8
Dec
2010
more thoughts…
A painter should not paint what he sees but what should be seen.
Valery
&
The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
Oscar Wilde
sometimes words describe very well what painting is about – strange though, that is easier to understand painting through the ears, than through the eyes!
1
Dec
2010
collection of thoughts 2
I’m nothing.
I’ll always be nothing.
I can’t even wish to be something.
Aside from that, I’ve got all the world’s dreams inside me.
F.Pessoa found words for the the artist…
15
Nov
2010
thoughts…
I think more than anything else I’m just an extension of certain practices, minimalism or conceptualism, that I am developing areas I think were not totally dealt with. I don’t like this idea of having to undermine your ancestors, of ridiculing them, undermining them, and making less out of them. I think we’re part of a historical process and I think that this attitude that you have to murder your father in order to start something new is bullshit. We are part of this culture, we don’t come from outer space, so whatever I do is already something that has entered my brain from some other sources and is then synthesized into something new. I respect my elders and I learn from them. There’s nothing wrong
with accepting that. I’m secure enough to accept those influences. I don’t have anxiety about originality, I really don’t.
an Interview with Felix Gonzalez-Torres by Robert Storr
all the thoughts that find words, after they found pictures? or how to describe what your heart already knows?
14
Jun
2010
Transit
on my way to the studio I ride my bike through viennas leagal graffiti – zone
I like that – there is great stuff – & frequently changing
yesterday – on the way to the studio I watched a girl spraying & it looked quite promising – on may way back home she was almost done & it was awesome (in the 2 years of frequenting this route I have only seen one other girl spraying – so that also made me extra curious!)
then this morning – I was disappionted – I saw this:
some guy – obviously – had destroyed it – just for the heck of it – usually there is respect for the work & somebody will take care to get himself a nice underground & then start working & trying to top the work… – but this was different & it made me wonder – from what I could see the work of destrucktion was writing his name – it was like pissing on the girls work
well I am not familiar with the content & context of graffiti – so probably I am missing out on some things here, but what it looks like to me – is that in this scene girls have a hard time!
2
Mar
2010
I was just touched by this…
I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether it has fulfilled its purpose.
Charlie Chaplin
I heard a quote – a piano player – she said she is not happy with her reputation as “perfekt” – she relates more to something charlie chaplin said: life is so short, we never get the chance to be anything but amateurs… – I wanted to find this quote – sure – internet… so I found many more…
this one is what I am trying to live up to – - - this is what I wish my art to become…
19
Nov
2009
More from the south
we have been painting – watercolors – a whole day and by and by the kids got into it, and even the teachers started to come by and give it a go that was nice, after all – it isn’t so easy to know if the things you suggest are appreciated, if you are standing in the classroom of a bunch of teenagers – they are talking zulu – or rather chanting, dancing, screaming zulu – and zooming in and out of the room – busying them selfs with various important tasks – I feel rather ignored but then they come up and smile and ask you: “when will we do this again”!
I started to paint & some of the kids saw it – they wanted me to teach them how to do that – I really have to think hard, because to me it is clear – you learn by doing, doing, doing, and then there is a little moment of support a teacher can give by asking the right question, or showing something, and then you continue – and you find out – not much can be teached really – you must incorporate – you want to know – you are craving to find out – what ever it is you are aiming for it needs all your attention and energy to satisfy – to make you feel like you are getting some where – you are understanding, changing, transforming – well – pathetic, but to me it seems like if I haven’t put myself into it, then the outcome will not surprise me – but that is what I want!
now I got myself into a real challenge – I observed, that the sewing-class doesn’t work out, the teacher is just putting the kids off by talking about patterns – that is a shame, because this is a skill that might come in really handy to these kids – from my point of view – some of them might love to make some clothes, one or the other might dream of getting into the world of fashion-design. just to be able to mend your clothes is helpful. this school is meant to support the kids from the surrounding townships teach them skills that will make them survive and find a way to move on & out of the total poverty so I will get my sewing-skills out of the back of my head & then let’s go – we will see what that does to my paintings -
I am starting on the african colors – I was so surprised to hear, that the architects, that are setting up the buildings on the school site said: africa has no color I see the opposite – amazing greens, because of the rain, red earth, blooming trees, occre hills in the back – and all changing in the very different light – today gray & damp – yesterday dry & bright – enormous sunsets & birds, bright yellow & another one red the next black & white with a splendid tail & no place without people – walking, sitting, squatting – carrying loads, searching & living in almost anything … anywhere…..
11
Nov
2009
Here we are… first week
first week
we get picked up & the journey in africa begins -staring out the window trying to explain to little one, why he shouldn’t wind down that window “it’s really hot mami” (I find it hard to find sensible words for that -) people everywhere; walking; sitting; working ; living on the street and then we chase through a supermarket – well garded – grab what ever I can think of, get a mobilephone connection – (we can only sell it to you, but we can’t register it – we are offline now – internet ??? – conditions taking me 10 years back
well, the on to “magagula hights” – more & more shabby housing along the roads, then only countryside, and finally – through a couple of fences we arrive at the ithuba skills college – caspar gets out of the car and into the group of playing kids from primary – he draws a lot of attention… I walk around and take in this fast growing, incredible place & I see people from Africa stranded in this poor surrounding getting introduced to europeans who love to share, to present & teach their ways, many ways, skills – that hopefully will give a chance to survive. I am very impressed – by the intelligent & caring headmaster – he deserves his name – myheart – & at the same time I recognise the few europeans that are around, including me, having the critical eye – seeing all the details that are not working – always knowing better – “that is africa” – I don’t know – I think it is the european mind straining for perfection, which can never be reached if you take in account that there is more than your idea – here some ideas have become real & then you see the difference between theory & life, and I guess it is a very good combination, the ideas have a space to be tried – and people who are thankful to try it, and just make it come alive.
the house we are staying in - all new – cute- still covered in a coat of dust – I manage to find some space in between the architecture where I can install the family – it turns out fine – now I still have to get some basic items for survival – there is a pot, a pan, 2 plates & some cups – that’s a start, it is a bit of a coordination with the timing to get to the fridge next door – ‘cos doors tend to be locked frequently… a teapot would be great & well…. I spare you the details, it’s just – it is about atleast 20 k’s to the next shop – so if you don’t have a car, you can’t just pop out to get the milk. (a specially if you are not sure about the local costumes of the “nogo’s for whities”…) I have to get used to being white….
28
Oct
2009
SOUTH AFRICA
so I am going to visit this place – and we will paint and work together – I am much looking forward to it
but now I am packing – trying to adjust the amount of what I want to take – comparing it with what I am aloud to take, and then sorting out what I am able to carry, or just keep under controll – as I am traveling with my 5 year old son – this defines a certan amount of toys and tools for him a load ful of books and his clothes.
after that I pack the materials and the painting equipment
then comes the computer and camera – sunscreen and toothbrush & the things you can’t transport in hand luggage – and here we go – stop -overload…
not to forget the shoes
I am still wondering if there is going to be a slight possibility for me to take at least a change of clothes alsong…
well – I guess this blogg is not going to contain any fotos of me…
11
Sep
2009
how do you explain your financial situation to others?
I am just trying to put in writing how I survive – without being selfpitying – I am fine with simple selfmade food – eating together, a small flat – less to look after, and my favorite waste of time is painting, my work, that is what I expect from life – I don’t need much more – I got my family around me.
but then when you plan a trip together with people with different expectations - you don’t want your friends to end up feeling they have to support you – or you are stingy – (I might be though ….) – well I just don’t have much money – that certanly has an impact on my lifestyle – but on the otherside – I have time to paint & I spend lot’s of time with my family…
I guess I will have to change this somehow – ? but I like it simple!
