1
Dec
2010
collection of thoughts 2
I’m nothing.
I’ll always be nothing.
I can’t even wish to be something.
Aside from that, I’ve got all the world’s dreams inside me.
F.Pessoa found words for the the artist…
25
Nov
2010
Paintings that got selected …
this diptochon was choosen to participae in a competition”ORIENT OKZIDENT” in offenbach – this is what I wrote about them:
John Berger said:
… But the essential way of seeing women, the essential use to which their images are put, has not changed. Women are depicted in a quite different way from men – not only because the feminine is different from the masculine – but because the ‘ideal’ spectator is always assumed to be male and the image of the woman
is designed to flatter him. If you have any doubt about that this is so, make the following experiment. Choose an image of a traditional nude. Transform the woman into a man. Either in your mind’s eye or by drawing on the reproduction. Then notice the violence which that transformation does. Not to the image, but to the assumptions of a likely viewer.
I had just read that, as I started to think about Orient & Occident, the history of iconography, the respect concerning taboos & painting images.
I thought about hair & how every plain area in my neighborhood is visually possessed by derobing & depilation mania – our poor senses!
is that freedom?
& on the other side women – covered up under huge amounts of textile – trying to cope with the kids in the swimmingpool or just on the playground
strange ideas cross my mind (fashionvictims???)
the strangeness of solutions that we manage to talk ourselves into beeing total logic
who is protected? she from him? he from her sight? now, is he incapacitated & she looses her identity?
15
Nov
2010
thoughts…
I think more than anything else I’m just an extension of certain practices, minimalism or conceptualism, that I am developing areas I think were not totally dealt with. I don’t like this idea of having to undermine your ancestors, of ridiculing them, undermining them, and making less out of them. I think we’re part of a historical process and I think that this attitude that you have to murder your father in order to start something new is bullshit. We are part of this culture, we don’t come from outer space, so whatever I do is already something that has entered my brain from some other sources and is then synthesized into something new. I respect my elders and I learn from them. There’s nothing wrong
with accepting that. I’m secure enough to accept those influences. I don’t have anxiety about originality, I really don’t.
an Interview with Felix Gonzalez-Torres by Robert Storr
all the thoughts that find words, after they found pictures? or how to describe what your heart already knows?
25
May
2010
WAYS OF SEEING
I am reading John Berger & I am impressed – about the point of view I am taking while I am painting…
… But the essential way of seeing women, the essential use to which their images are put, has not changed. Women are depicted in a quite different way from men – not only because the feminine is different from the masculine – but because the ‘ideal’ spectator is always assumed to be male and the image of the woman is designed to flatter him. If you have any doubt about that this is so, make the following experiment. Choose an image of a traditional nude. Transform the woman into a man. Either in your mind’s eye or by drawing on the reproduction. Then notice the violence which that transformation does. Not to the image, but to the assumptions of a likely viewer.
4
May
2010
I just looked through last years dokumentation -
& found this panorama:
http://panoramas.cgtechniques.com/masc-osei/2009-05-21%20Masc/index.html?src=Raum1.mov
quit amazing view of the space – …you almost miss the paintings whirling round …
26
Apr
2010
EXAMPLE
here you can see me rehearsing & figuring out in my studio – & the you see where I take it next
there is still way to go…
you are welcome to propose – if you have an idea!
19
Dec
2009
Downtown Johannesburg
what a crowded place – I only got to take some photographs in the rather open spaces… & from the -top of Africa- in the carltoncentre – the highest house in africa – like the view- though the wind really howls around it
we walked around, in all the noise – everybody is beeping their horns constantly, police cars howl & there is no respect for pedestrians – we did’nt see a white person in the open – our host, from europe, she uses the public space, but all others told us in what kind of danger we are, but we met quite friendly & the usual – urban stressed people – most of them loved our littleones dragontail – (his basic accessoire – in one of the fotos)
then we went to see the suburbs – the american dream – or who’s dream is it – house with a garden, like Adelaide? The only difference is there is serious fencing around, and guards sitting on the street, what a strange feeling that is to drive through that street, imagining all the people in their little protected wellfare home – what are they doing in there, what do they have to go through to go out? & what does the poor guy (black of course) think, he who is stitting outside to defend the tranquility? It seems scary to me to sit in a cage and shut the world out, so we went back to downtown, locked in the car & through a couple of security codes out of the city to our town-ship – suburb (that is what we could call this school) we live next to the town-ship in a fenced of property.
So back to painting the sky & such – ignoring the fences for a while…
12
Dec
2009
high noon – workshop – birthday
just some images
fromthe taylor workshop
a birthdayparty at primary
& loads to carry in the middle of the day
as it is in life – all at the same time
next time i will post paintings… thank you all for the visit – it is a very challenging snail-mail here, so be patient with my replies…
yours cynthia
19
Nov
2009
More from the south
we have been painting – watercolors – a whole day and by and by the kids got into it, and even the teachers started to come by and give it a go that was nice, after all – it isn’t so easy to know if the things you suggest are appreciated, if you are standing in the classroom of a bunch of teenagers – they are talking zulu – or rather chanting, dancing, screaming zulu – and zooming in and out of the room – busying them selfs with various important tasks – I feel rather ignored but then they come up and smile and ask you: “when will we do this again”!
I started to paint & some of the kids saw it – they wanted me to teach them how to do that – I really have to think hard, because to me it is clear – you learn by doing, doing, doing, and then there is a little moment of support a teacher can give by asking the right question, or showing something, and then you continue – and you find out – not much can be teached really – you must incorporate – you want to know – you are craving to find out – what ever it is you are aiming for it needs all your attention and energy to satisfy – to make you feel like you are getting some where – you are understanding, changing, transforming – well – pathetic, but to me it seems like if I haven’t put myself into it, then the outcome will not surprise me – but that is what I want!
now I got myself into a real challenge – I observed, that the sewing-class doesn’t work out, the teacher is just putting the kids off by talking about patterns – that is a shame, because this is a skill that might come in really handy to these kids – from my point of view – some of them might love to make some clothes, one or the other might dream of getting into the world of fashion-design. just to be able to mend your clothes is helpful. this school is meant to support the kids from the surrounding townships teach them skills that will make them survive and find a way to move on & out of the total poverty so I will get my sewing-skills out of the back of my head & then let’s go – we will see what that does to my paintings -
I am starting on the african colors – I was so surprised to hear, that the architects, that are setting up the buildings on the school site said: africa has no color I see the opposite – amazing greens, because of the rain, red earth, blooming trees, occre hills in the back – and all changing in the very different light – today gray & damp – yesterday dry & bright – enormous sunsets & birds, bright yellow & another one red the next black & white with a splendid tail & no place without people – walking, sitting, squatting – carrying loads, searching & living in almost anything … anywhere…..
29
Oct
2009
Packing up the Studio
here I am – sorting out my paintings before I leave them for 3 months – they will have to survive the winter alone!
I am off to johannesburg – as an artist in residence – I am looking forward to all the new things
I’ll be back…
